Warning: I’m about to take it to a WHOLE new level with my comfort on this blog. This is just one more thing you can shake your head at me and say, “why in the world?” Don’t say I did not warn you.
Do you ever get so bored or tired that you randomly look through every single photograph on your computer? Well, this happened to me about two weeks ago and when I stumbled upon the photographs and videos from China, I immediately went into withdrawal. It’s different traveling with a group; you share a little piece of them forever. I’ve been missing that group since then and when one of my traveling buddies emailed me the following photographs, I nearly peed my pants laughing. No pun intended (you’ll get the joke in about ten seconds).
Well, let me set the scene. The Chinese are constantly drinking alcohol at every meal, so at every opportunity it presented itself, I did not turn it down. Some lunches were a heck of a lot more interesting once we each had a beer and shot of who-knows-what. We had been traveling all morning and stopped to enjoy a nice local lunch. Now let me remind you that I continued to drink a TON of water on top of the alcohol in China because I:
- refused to get sick
- just needed to meet my daily requirement
- wanted to use every public bathroom in China that was available to tourists (that’s joke*)
So when it came time for us to get back onto the bus and head to the hotel to prep for the evening’s activities, of course I tried one more time. Well, I didn’t think that I was going to be STUCK IN RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC FOR LIKE THREE EFFING HOURS. No joke. I remembered thinking, FUCK. I’m going to literally pee my pants. There were no bathrooms on our mini bus and on both sides of the bus there were like two lanes of stopped vehicles. No building let alone bathroom in sight. And it was raining. I politely asked the driver how much longer: forty five minutes to an hour.
No way. There was no way I was going to make it back. So I did the unthinkable. Yes, yes I did. “Does anyone have a plastic baggy?” Malcom: “Yes! I’ve been waiting the whole trip to give one of these away!” Well, he handed me a sanwich baggy and I KNEW that was NOT going to work. At this point, everyone was digging for something bigger. Alas, insert freezer baggy. On cue, the ladies followed me to the back of the bus and stood around me, shielding me from the local traffic.
It seemed like the moment I went to squat, the bus started moving. Jerking actually. It was quite the balancing act that seemed to take forever, but I did it. No spills. Little did I know, Lindsay was snapping away and documenting the whole event. Once I held up the finished product I heard, “JOONNNAAA! You get an A! Who knew someone could hold that much pee in at once!” Yeah, that was the professor; who was also accompanied by the Dean of the MBA program and the Dean of students. I was eh, proud, to say the least.
And there I sat, proud as a peacock for over an hour waiting to get back to the hotel; where I then had to carry it through the lobby. Gross.
My roommate slept through the entire thing and seemed mortified when we showed her the photographs. Add this to my list of accomplishments right next to not showering for thirty-two days to try and win a brand new car. I really hadn’t known any of my peers other than through passing in previous classes. I felt like at this point, we came together as a group that would stick it out, together. You’re welcome.